Raising and nurturing children is one of the most significant undertakings a person can do. You’re fully responsible for this tiny human and their path to adulthood. In different seasons of life, it can also feel all-consuming. You want to give your children everything you can, but this can sometimes lead to burnout and parental guilt.
Nurturing and caring for others, however, work best if the caretaker is well. It’s hard to fill others’ cups when your own is empty. You’ve likely heard that when flying, you should put on your own oxygen mask first before helping others. That best practice is a beautiful metaphor for parenting. A healthy parent in body, mind, and spirit is paramount.
So what can you do when the world of child-rearing is chaotic? Keep reading to learn how parents prioritize nurturing their children.
Table of Contents
Prioritize Nutrition
It can be difficult to think through and plan healthy meals with so much going on. When your kids are little, they might also be picky, so you eat their leftover butter noodles. When they are a bit older, you might be on the road for activities a lot, which can make drive-thru meals seem appealing. If you’re eating junk consistently, you likely will start feeling like rubbish as well.
It’s also not a great model for your kiddos. Eating healthy doesn’t have to mean hours in the kitchen and a multicourse meal. For on-the-go times, you can try granola or smoothies. Protein powder, fruit, super greens powder, and a natural juice or almond milk can make a healthy smoothie with the nutrients your body (or their body) needs. Pack protein bars and some fresh veggie sticks or apples for the car for times people get hungry between activities, too.
Get in Movement
Moving your body is so important for your overall physical and mental health. It’s also an activity you can do solo or with the family. Not only is getting out to walk or exercise so good for you, it models healthy living to your children. They watch you for a guide of how to do life. If your activities are mostly watching movies and snacks, they will mirror those habits.
If an evening walk or bike ride, or even a run through the park, is the norm, they will likely do that too. If your kids are asking to go outside and play a lot and you don’t want to, ask yourself why. Saying yes, getting outside and grounding yourself in nature and feeling the sun, can make you feel so much better.
You can get in a lot of movement playing with your kids. As a bonus, you won’t feel guilty at the end of the night wishing you would have given them attention.
Do Things You Enjoy
One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself and your kids is sharing what you enjoy with them. Having hobbies or interests teaches your kids that adults are people with feelings and interests too. Things like hiking or fishing or building Legos or reading can be great stress-relievers. Making time for them can help you feel like an individual and not just a parent. And your kids will also see you with more depth.
Watching you play creates a picture for them of what adults are too. If they like and share your hobby it can help with self-esteem and shared experiences as well. It can even create a bonding activity for your family. Doing things together like playing games or working on cars also creates an activity you can do for years to come. It can be hard to have big talks at the table, but chats on the trail or building models can come easier.
Show Your Kids You’re Human
Sometimes the greatest gift you can give to yourself and, in turn, your children is showing humanity. If you’re grieving a family member passing, it’s OK to let them see you cry and talk to them about it. It’s okay to let them know you’re feeling a little overwhelmed and need some alone time. You can even establish a routine to schedule time by yourself. Maybe the kids know mom takes a couple hours on Sunday to go to the gym and grab coffee.
Dad might have solo time and go to his office to play video games on Wednesday nights. Not only is having this separation good for you, it shows your kids the importance of self-care. In doing these things, you can help your kids develop care habits for themselves too. Maybe they can have a bubble bath and movie night on Friday evenings, for example. Working in times of respite after a hard week is good for everyone.
Reframe Your “Have Tos”
Unfortunately, a common part of parenting is feeling like you can never measure up. In today’s age of social media, comparison can be the biggest thief of joy. It’s not lazy to need downtime. You don’t have to be perfect at home and work every day.
In fact, it’s impossible to be. Some weeks, home life will take priority and other weeks work will. And there is no-way to have perfect balance and give every aspect 100%. But you can work toward finding peace and presence. Be present for work when you are there. Be present at home when you are there.
Parenting is hard, but it’s also so rewarding. You get to experience a love that whittles its way into every corner of your soul. But it also can be frustrating and overwhelming, and it can make finding identity blurry. Afterall, a lot of people will just know you as “Olivia’s Mom” now.
Find ways to pour into yourself as well as your family. A whole parent can give much more than one that’s being depleted. Release guilt over time alone and come back recharged to play and be present. You matter, and caring for yourself shows your children how to be healthy adults with boundaries.
