Teaching your children about your disability from an early age will teach them compassion, inclusivity, and develop their understanding of the world. 61 million Americans currently have disabilities and 4.1 million of them are parents, according to the ADA National Network.
Parenting with a disability can be challenging and you shouldn’t be afraid to share your highs and lows with your children. Here’s how to raise kids that will embrace and support your disability.
Explaining your disability
No matter whether your disability is visible or invisible, your kids need to know about it.
It’s often easier to explain visible disabilities to children, particularly younger ones, as they can see that you have problems with your legs, coordination, and similar.
But if you have a disability, such as ASD or EDS, explain your symptoms and how it affects you.
Online resources are a good way to help your children understand and there are plenty of forums, Facebook groups, and charities that will be able to guide you.
It’s also important that your children are aware of what you can and can’t do so you can manage their expectations.
For example, if you’ve got fibromyalgia you may be hypersensitive to sounds.
So, if attending your child’s school musical is not possible, your children need to be prepared for this.
Financial support
The National Bureau of Economic Research reports that 10 years after being diagnosed with a disability, an individual’s earnings typically drop by 79%.
Thankfully, you can still receive money to support your family by claiming Social Security disability.
But it can take more than 2 years for your claim to be granted and success often depends on the judge in your case.
The likelihood of being approved for SSI in a judge-based case is 54%.
Although, some judges have a much higher approval rate than others.
When you’re waiting for your case to be assessed, speak to your children about how financially tight things are, so they don’t keep asking for new toys, gadgets, or allowances.
If you have older teens, talk to them about taking on a part-time job to help out, too.
Older children can even help your SSI claim go through by writing a letter to the judge detailing how your disability affects you.
Getting your children involved
Disability is a journey and you should encourage your children to join you in it.
This may include things such as getting them to help you with things you find difficult, such as chopping vegetables.
You should also be a positive role model for your kids.
Show them that your disability doesn’t stop you from being a good parent or a good person.
It’s also worth taking the time to sit down with your child and let them talk openly to you.
They may have worries that you can help them deal with.
Being a disabled parent is a different experience.
But that’s not a bad thing as your disability can help you build an amazing bond with your child that you’ll both cherish forever.
