Being a new mom is tough, but making new mom friends can feel awkward, unnatural, and can take lot of energy that we already lack.
When I had my little one, I had a ton of girlfriends, but there was one problem: they lived at least 45 minutes away and what I really needed was a girlfriend that lived nearby.
For me, the hardest part of making new mom friends was letting go of the thought that I had to only be friends with my pre-parenthood friends. With them, It was easy and comfortable. I knew that it was time to step outside my comfort zone and open my heart to new friendships.
In the early newborn stages, I would stroll my baby around the neighborhood stalking my prey (moms) like a zombie.
“Oh, you have such a cute baby,” I would blurt out to the mom strolling nearby.
I would walk faster and accidentally bump into her so we can talk about topics such as potty training, the terrible twos and teething because everyone has a story about that. We would talk and go our tired ways, but that was where the friendship started and ended.
Looking back, I probably looked very desperate and needy. Making New Mom Friends doesn’t have to be that hard. I have discovered a few places where you are likely to make a new mom friend that one day, could be that mom friend that you cherish.
Where to Make New Mom Friends
Fitness Classes, Clubs & The Dreaded Gym
Almost any community has a variety of fitness classes or clubs to offer! A few to check out are Mommy and Me Courses, Stroller Strides, Baby Boot Camp classes or any clubs that focus on your preferred physical activity: running, yoga, swimming, dancing, etc. Most gyms have a daycare center for your children to play in while you workout. You can usually bond with a few parents during the drop-off and pick-up periods, because that time period is when you can relate to each other the most. “Oh, your child has social anxiety too?” It’s a great way to reduce stress, burn calories and meet new mom friends.
Start a Mom or Parenting Blog
Little to my surprise when I decided to start a local mom blog for our community (Cue shameless plug: McKinney Moms Blog), what I got in return was 10 new mom friends that write for the blog. When we get together to brainstorm, we end up having a great time. We laugh, we vent and share our parenting adventures that we later blog about. Plus, it’s a great excuse to socialize and a perfect way to network with other moms that love to write, share their feelings and take a variety of selfies.
Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS)
MOPS is a great way to connect with other moms of preschoolers (Birth to Kindergartners). Most communities have local chapters. Check online for community chapters.
Your Local Library
A library is great for parents because they usually offer a diverse variety of children’s programs for a free or low cost. Ranging from storytelling hour for the little ones to Mom and Daughter Book Clubs for the tweens and teens, there is usually something for everyone no matter your age. You are bound to bump into a mom with similar interests as you!
Get outside and go to a park. There has to be local moms that are dying for an adult conversation while their kids play. Just make sure you actually play with your children and not ignore them, because there are some creeps that frequent the parks now and then (IMO). I always end up talking to a new mom at the park because my child will play with their kid no problem (or steal their toy). Either way, kids make friends easier than adults, so take advantage of that skill. Your kids are the matchmakers in this situation.
Cafe and Coffee Shops
Sounds like an odd place to meet a mom friend, but you would be amazed at the amount of moms that I see standing in line with a baby or child on their hip anxiously waiting for their liquid gold to get their day going. An easy pick up line in this situation would be, “I can’t function without coffee, how about you?” Then the conversation can move into why you need coffee so bad whether it’s teething, in-law drama, or ear infections that kept you up all night. Whatever you do, no matter if it’s true or not – Do not tell other moms that your child sleeps through the night and never wakes up. Moms have a way of comparing and feeling like a failure if their child isn’t doing the same. Find a topic to relate to and if you have to fib a little, it’s okay in this situation until you become BFFE’s.
Extra Curricular Activities = Mommy Social Hour
Most likely there will be other moms waiting in the room during their children’s extra curricular activities. Stop trying to live your social life on Facebook through your mobile and instead strike up a (real-life) conversation with the moms sitting nearby. They will appreciate the adult interaction and before you know it an hour as flown by and it’s time to go home. After a few classes in, you can easily invite them over for a playdate with your children which also counts as social hour for the adults.
Making new mom friends can feel like stepping back into the dreaded dating scene, but with the right attitude and confidence you can find your new mommy friend in no time.
All it takes is getting outside of the house, stepping out of our comfort zone and inviting ourselves in to enjoy mom friendships.
Did I miss any? Where do you make friends?