Moms are all different, but there’s one thing they have in common – most are lacking in enough ‘me’ time. Looking after the kids, running them to piano lessons, sports practice or dance classes, picking them up and dropping them off to school, tending to the house and having a career – it’s easy to think there’s no time left for you.
For that reason, some single parents believe that the dating world is not for them. If you haven’t got enough time for yourself, how can you make time for a relationship with another person? Fortunately, with a bit of time management you’ll find dating needn’t be forgotten, and it could open up a whole new world of opportunities.
Create some down time
It sounds simple, and it really is – be sure to build some down time into your schedule. It doesn’t need to be a huge chunk of time: just 15 minutes of relaxation a day can be hugely beneficial. Turn off the phone, put down the laptop and just do something you enjoy for a few minutes – whether it’s meditation, going for a walk or watching your favourite TV show. Remember, there’s no cause to feel guilty about having some time to yourself.
Decide if you have time to date
If you think you’re ready for a new relationship, think about whether you have time to date. Most of us can make time if we really look at what we do. Perhaps you would leave work earlier if you banned yourself from social media sites all day. If your kids are old enough they can help with household chores. For younger children, housework could even be turned into a game in the style of Mary Poppins.
Particularly if your children are younger, you may find it hard to meet potential partners by traditional means. Going to bars or on dates set up by friends might be difficult and expensive if you have to organize childcare. That’s where online dating sites, such as eHarmony, really help. You can chat to people online in your own time and from the comfort of your own home.
This way, if you find someone you really click with and decide you do want to meet up for a real-life date, you’ll already be feeling pretty positive and are less likely to waste money on a babysitter to go out with someone you find you have nothing in common with. Click here to find out more about online dating.
All about the timing
So, you’ve bitten the bullet and signed up for a dating website. Now what? With such sites as eHarmony you can hone your search to a particular area – maybe you want to date single dads in Halifax, for example – and you’ll be matched only with people who are compatible with your interests, beliefs and so on.
Don’t be shy. If you see someone you like then say “hello” – the worst they can do is say “no thanks”. When you’ve connected with someone and exchanged a few messages and maybe phonecalls, you may want to meet in real life. With one or both of you having children, here it really is about the timing.
If you both work then a lunchtime coffee date could be the best way to meet each other in person for the first time. It’s making good use of your lunch break and gives you a set time to work to so if you don’t get along as expected you have a reason to leave. And if things do go to plan you’ll be eager to set up another, longer meeting.
Take things at your own pace
Particularly where children are involved, it’s important to be clear what you want from a relationship. Be honest with your children and explain about going on dates in a way they’ll understand. Remember, even adult children might feel strange about their mom dating again, but will come around when they see how happy you are.
Be sure to make time for your kids so they don’t feel like they’re being abandoned, as well as setting aside date nights so your partner knows you’re serious about them.
Online dating is a great way of meeting new people entirely at your own pace. It can fit into your life no matter how busy your schedule, enabling you to meet that perfect someone.